Confessions of conformity.

Confessions of conformity.

“Holy Holy Holy is the Lord Almighty

The whole earth is filled with your glory.”

God whose glory expands throughout the whole earth and into creation that we may never see in this lifetime, is worthy of all of my praise. It is my natural reaction to give praise to what fills my soul with purpose and joy. Yet, so often, I am overwhelmed by my flesh and fail to truly praise Him the way my heart so desires.

I have been challenged by the question God spoke into my life today, “How do you expect to change the world when you are conforming to what the world is doing?”

I’ve used every excuse in the book. I stood in church today, singing songs written by my worship leaders at Passion City Church, not just one song, but all of them. Every single song. But my worship looked different. One hand held the hymnal and the other placed by my side. Heart bowed but hands that were too scared to be lifted because “no one else was doing it.” It didn’t take a long time before I was convicted to the point of tears. God. The God I worship back home in Georgia is the same God whom I stood to worship in Rome today. There is nothing about Him that has changed, but my heart was overcome with conformity. “Maybe they don’t worship that way here,” “maybe people will judge me if I raise my hands higher than the pew in front of me,” maybe, maybe, maybe. The same words to the same songs of the same God and my mind was overcome with fear that I may stick out amongst this new congregation. God has done nothing to make me praise Him less, if anything has shown me more of His beauty in the last few months than I have ever seen before.

When I walked away from church today, I felt as though I betrayed Him. World changers do not conform. World changers acknowledge the Light that is within them and shine as if no one is watching. Who are we looking to please? If it is man, I may as well stand for the rest of my life with my hands by my side. But my life isn’t for anyone or anything besides the Living God so to what degree will I let others have a say in the way that I worship? God has done nothing but show me exponential reasons to praise His name. He has not held anything back from me. Who am I to hold back my worship to Him? Conformity may be something as simple as not raising your hands when all you want to do is fall on your face before the throne. Nonetheless, it is giving God less than what He deserves.

We can’t look different when we are conforming to this world instead of letting Jesus transform us. And again, another glimpse into the heart transplant that God so graciously has given me. Praise Him that every moment is another chance. He deserves more than my fear of worship. He deserves everything I am lifted high in worship.